wavyarms: (Grr)
I remembered mid-morning why I'm rather tired and grumpy today. I had nightmares last night about Buxtehude. I suppose that makes me a certifiable music geek, not that I was feeling inadequate before.

We were having our Kantorei concert, and it was scheduled at an earlier date that I expected, and caught me off guard, and I hadn't practiced my solo, and I didn't have time to get my dress before the concert, and I also hadn't bought the music yet, so I had to get my mom home to drive me home during intermission so I could get my dress, while she went to the bookstore to buy my music, and I was flinging clothes all over the room looking for a black choral dress, and they were all dirty, so I just wore a dirty one, and I was stressing out about the fact that I hadn't practiced the solo, and DM told me to meet with the accompanist during intermission so he could coach me on ornamentation, but I couldn't, b/c I was home throwing on a dirty choral dress and afraid I wouldn't make it back in time, etc. I do remember thinking in the dream that if I could just get back in time, dressed and with my music, then I could probably sight-read the darn solo, and telling myself that I could relax if I just got back to the concert in time.

It's funny now, but it was quite a stressful dream! One of those where you have to sit up in bed and concentrate on something concrete in reality, like the dresser, or your hand, so that you don't slip back into the negative dream-head-space.

Buxtehude. Why can't I just dream about flying, like everyone else?

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wavyarms

June 2013

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